then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
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