see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize