guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
