u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
that may or may not have been my penis.
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