STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
