I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
My vagina is very pro this idea
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
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