i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I don't deserve a penis
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
