belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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