Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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