last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Randomize
