Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I'm at about main and main street
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
