he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Randomize
