the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
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