People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
