Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
