Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
