i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
