he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
