Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Randomize
