Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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