That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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