how can u be prego again
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
