Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
