Soap is not a condiment
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
