Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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