When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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