if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
