it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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