I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
