How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
