party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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