it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
