in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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