Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
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