dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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