i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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