This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I deserve this hangover.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
