so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
