the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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