dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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