I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
