So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Randomize
