So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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