very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
