I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
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