Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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