Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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