Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
