FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
