Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
